


Tom Paris shouldn't Improvise

by orphan_account



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Chaos, Crack, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Crack, Harry wants to play mind games, M/M, Neelix was giving advice, Other, Tom Wants Harry, Tom should've actually listened
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:08:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26132428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: After multiple failed attempts to ask Harry Kim out, Neelix gives Tom Paris an idea.A very bad idea involving lying, fake relationships, playing hard to get, and a very confused but along for the ride EMH.
Relationships: Harry Kim/Tom Paris, The Doctor (Star Trek) & Tom Paris
Comments: 3
Kudos: 5





	1. tom does things

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing fanfiction, so please tell me any ideas to improve this. I haven't got too far into Voyager yet, so just bear with me on this idea that came to me at 2am.
> 
> There will be more chapters sometime in the near future.

Tom Paris was getting desperate.

For some reason, Harry was avoiding him. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem, but this situation was anything but normal.

The terrific plan he had made was falling apart before it even started.

His plan had relied on getting Harry to the mess hall before the daily commotion. Harry was, however, gone. Disappeared. Vanished. Possibly sucked into another dimension. Anything can happen when you're stuck in the Delta quadrant.

_Well so much for that idea… nice try Paris._

He sighed. If he was going to ever do this, it had to be now. Harry wasn't actively looking for a date, but he was sure to get somebody soon. Ensign Kim was handsome, clever, sweet, and he even played the clarinet! Hell, Harry was everything a girl could want! ~~And everything Tom wanted.~~

He walked (although it was more of a strut to everybody else) into the mess hall. Harry wasn't there as far as he could see, and it was far too crowded anyway for his plan anyway.

_I know him. He wouldn't want to be confessed to in front of the entire crew._

He found some edible looking food from Neelix's buffet, hoped it wouldn't cause him to swell up, turn blue, or spontaneously combust, and began to eat.

With a bit of luck, things could still work out.

~


	2. Damnit Harry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chaos begins slowly, alright?

Tom played with his food. He was still nervous from the trainwreck that was his confession plan.

He looks around. Harry was still nowhere to be seen. He was probably eating in his room or-

"Lieutenant."

Tom jumped. He hadn't noticed Tuvok walk up to him, and wasn't in the mood to talk.

"Tuvok! What can I do for you?" Tom said, hoping to get this social interaction done so he can get back to sulking.

"You never saw me here." Tuvok replied. 

Was this sarcasm? Some mission? Aliens? 

Before Tom could ask, Tuvok disappeared again. And the reason for this was speedily approaching with gossip, and samples of some alien dish.

~

Harry Kim was about to test a theory.

A theory about Tom Paris, and the rate at which people talk about things on Voyager.

If Tom congratulated him, he knew that things were as normal as things could be. If Tom looked ever so slightly pained, he knew that either Tom wanted a girl, or Tom wanted him.

Now all he had to do was enact his plan. He could probably find somebody that wanted to help him with his theory, or somebody who just wanted to mess with Tom Paris.

This couldn't backfire in any way. That wouldn't happen. Tom Paris had the most predictable actions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will probably update this later today because I'm like that.


	3. Gossip and Neelix

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neelix happens. Gossip happens.

Tom watched Tuvok disappear into the crowd. It was confusing, but it couldn't get worse.

Just kidding it will.

Neelix scurried over with a platter full of food. Tom wasn't in the mood for any more of his cooking, but Neelix wouldn't have that.

"You must try these, Lieutenant!" Neelix said, while showing him what appeared to be cookies, "I had them requested by some security officers! I might have added a few more spices, but I'm sure you'll love them!"

"No thanks, I'm not really in the mood."

He never actually _was_ in the mood for Neelix's food, but he wasn't in the mood for anything right now.

"Is this about Ensign Kim?" Neelix asked, sitting down.

Tom Paris never knew much about panic. He felt sad, miserable, desolate, and many others, but never panic.

There's a first time for everything.

Tom Paris hoped Neelix hadn't noticed his heartrate, and asked him what he meant.

"Oh..." Neelix gave him a look while setting down his platter of cookies, " _You know..._ "

Tom Paris did not know. He didn't think he wanted to either.

Neelix saw Tom's confusion, and happily explained "He was kissing a lady in the storage closets! It might've been one of those sisters he's into, I'm not sure. I thought he would've told you by now!"

"No," Tom said, feeling his heart sink and his brain fog "I actually haven't seen him all day."

_Harry kissed a girl. Did they make-out? Were they dating? Did Tom Paris miss his chance before he even rolled the dice? How did Neelix know but not him? Was this why Harry avoided him?_

~

Neelix was also worried. About Tom. He was acting strange. But then again, this was his job as the one and only moral related officer on this ship. He should be helping him!

"So, Lieutenant Paris, how are you doing today? You seem a bit... tired." Neelix's attempt at another greeting was an attempt.

"I'm fine just a bit... out of tune? Guess that thing about Harry caught me off guard."

Maybe it was Harry that was the problem? The kiss gossip seemed to set him off. Problems with a girl? That seemed like a Tom Paris problem!

"Have you been doing things I should know about, Tom?" Neelix phrased it teasingly. If the topic was going to go to Kes, however, it wouldn't be so light.

Wait no, don't jump to conclusions. It's probably just some officer. Maybe it's the one who rejected his cookies.

"Well..." Tom said slowly "I guess I'm pining after somebody."

"So that explains that surly attire! That reminds me of that time I-"

"Not now, Neelix."

"Ah, right."

Well what was he waiting for? This was the time he was supposed to give advice!

"Well Mr. Paris, if you're pining for somebody, perhaps play hard to get? If they want you too, they'd probably express it! I wouldn't go-"

Suddenly Tom had an idea.

A very bad idea.

"Gotta go Neelix!" He half-shouted as he half-ran out of the mess hall.

He should've waited for Neelix to finish talking. It would have fixed most of the chaos that was about to ensure.

~~I wouldn't go too far if I were you. You might over do it, you know?~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the plot is finally in action! Chaos from here on out folks!
> 
> :)


End file.
